Running Quickly

"after she had given him a drink, she said, "i'll draw water for your camels too, until they have finished drinking." so she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough to feed all of his camels...." (Genesis 24:19-20)

i've been running lately; training for "the great river run" at the end of august. i hate running. i'm not good at it. well, i guess i shouldn't say i hate it because i've actually really wanted to run on days i'm supposed to "rest".... ha! but seriously, it's boring... there's no one to talk to and there's no one to beat except yourself, and sometimes, i loose even then! 

anyhow, as i was getting ready for a run the other day, i remember saying, "God, i reeeally don't want to go running today". and as i was lacing up my second shoe, i heard Him say to me, "I'll go with you, every run".  and with that, i took off.

during that run, i starting thinking about Rebekah's servant heart in Genesis 24. now there's been a lot of commentary and sermons given on this chapter of how men can find wives, but that's not what i get from it. 

brief summary: Isaac needs a wife. his father, Abraham, sends out his servant to find one for him. while praying for guidance, this beautiful girl, Rebekah, walks down to him. he asks her for a drink of water and she "quickly lowered her jar to her hand and gave him a drink". (Genesis 24:18) not only did she quickly do it, she also said she would draw water for all of his camels too. "after she had given him a drink, she said, "i'll draw water for all of your camels too, until they have finished drinking." so she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough for all his camels." (Genesis 24:19-20) 

looking closer at the text, i think this is something more than teaching us how to find a mate... i think this shows us how we can be people who quickly run and lay down our lives for the sake of the lost. i think God is looking for a servant that will quickly run! this is what God's doing throughout the whole earth... commissioning the Holy Spirit to captivate people to be the bride of Christ. the number one characteristic of the bride is.....drumroll......................... a servants heart! 

in this story, he had 10 camels. camels consume 40 gallons of water each. you do the math. she lowered her jar, quickly, into the well to quench the thirst of these 10 camels... that's 400 times (assuming the bucket or jar was a gallon)! and she does it quickly! it must have taken all day! she is a servant. just as Abraham's servant was looking for a servant for Isaac to marry, God too, is looking for a servant-hearted person to be part of His bride. 

i pray that the generation that's being raised up right now realizes that we need to be servants first. we can be about community, social justice, discipleship, etc.- that's all good, but what's at the root of it all? they all branch off of the fact that Jesus Christ deserves the reward of His suffering. we sacrifice and do all that we do because we want Jesus to be beautiful. so we serve the poor and pray our guts out so the world can see the beauty of Jesus.

Jesus says the meek will inherit the earth. i want to be a meek and humble servant, like Rebekah, that runs quickly. so i'm going to go grab my shoes...

Until It's Time to Move On

"...So many times Christians naturally move toward to the conservative candidate due to pro-life issues with abortion, while they ignore the utter disregard for life already being lived out on earth. Is standing up for unborn children enough to negate the disregard for human life already in motion pertaining to the acts of war and sacrifice? Misplaced energy seems to be a re-occurring theme in our society as of late. We're based on hard lined inconsistency and selective conscience. The left and right are far off the mark at this point, but a line must be drawn somewhere. Secondly, Humanity is meant to self destruct itself, i'm sure of it. We are born to be children of purpose and hope, yet we are filled with lies and sow destruction at every turn. We have no regard for others, just selfish gain on all accounts. What a waste my life has been, so many days of this last quarter century....the only thing bringing any validity is God's grace and purpose.... We spend our days sneaking and lying through sleepless patches of existence. We are going to hurt and be hurt. God is the only thing worth living for. I see this clearly at such random points in life. I know it's truth, but only at the most desperate points do I see it so beautifully and clearly. I've given up on this life, but the future is bright. We just have to do our best to push through and seek God in all things until it's time to move on."

-Tim McTague, Underoath

gosh, i just love what Tim is talking about here. so often i feel the same way! if it were possible for me to count the wasted moments and days of absolute stupidity and selfishness of my life compared to the times where i was living with purpose and direction from God, they would be 100/1. i feel trapped in this body, trapped in this apartment, trapped in this country and it's stupid culture... just trapped on this earth. 

sometimes, those clear and beautiful moments Tim is talking about come to me, and it hits me like a ton of bricks. it just so happened to of have happened twice this week. once, as i was talking with an old friend. he was asking me when the "old jenna" was coming back. he proceeded to ask me questions regarding how i've "changed" and why im living the way i'm living. 

as i continued to speak this truth of how the gospel has transformed my heart, i couldn't help but to sit there thinking of how many times i'm "lying through sleepless patches of existence", and how this life is nothing compared to that of the next. a life that doesn't neglect life- the unborn or existing. a life that's filled with endless praise and worship. a life that's not about war and selfishness. that's the life i wanna live for. that's why i wanna wake up every day and proclaim Christ. those are the reasons i choose to live this way i told him.

the second, happened to be last night. i was at a prayer conference sitting in a room with people from all over the nation and even from other parts of the world who are on a mission to pray. i felt convicted again watching those around me fall on their faces to honor and worship their King. their posture showed their heart and their heart was love and honor. they weren't living for their neighbor next to them or any other reason but to reach out to God. we weren't created to be selfish. we weren't created to live for any other thing in this world. i'm reminded of this often and pledge to wake up in the morning and tell myself that i'm not of this place, my home is not here, i'm not living for this world. 

i wanna push through it... i wanna wake up and seek You Father for purpose and direction until it's time to move on.